It was beautifully sunny in Seattle yesterday. We knew it was going to rain the rest of the week while we’re here so we got out there and walked, rode the city buses, hiked around Pike Place Market and generally had a ball. What a great day. Happy sigh. We were power walking up huge hills that just killed me almost 100 pounds. Now, they look like little gopher hills. I could have run up them.
I’m coming to you from my deceased Dad’s computer, which we still call “Dad’s computer”. As you may remember my computer is dead as a doornail now. I think we’ve just about decided that I’ll go with an ipad instead of spending double the money on a new laptop. Laptops are SO HEAVY when you’re lugging them around an airport. I think an ipad would be a good solution.
And guess what? My cell phone and boarding passes that I protect with my life? Yeah. I left them in the hotel room in Albuquerque when I ran for the hotel shuttle. Oye. My new iphone. Double Oye. I had just enough change on me to call my husband in Seattle and wake him up at 4 a.m. to ask for his help (Every single phone book at the airport had all of the hotel directories torn out.) and then I had to live in fear all the way to my layover in Salt Lake City, wondering if they had found it. My husband has left some very expensive things in hotel rooms over the years that, surprisingly, the staff “never saw”. I was having to actively choose to believe in the good of mankind, I’ll tell you what. And yes, my phone was right there. Wahoo! My daughter picked it up on Saturday morning so it’s waiting for me at home in Albuquerque.
So now, after dreaming of doing without technology for awhile, guess what? I’m doing without technology for awhile. My husband loaned me his personal phone since he has his business phone on him, but all of my fun apps are on my phone so I’m not really using his, just carrying it in case I have a problem and need to be rescued. I have to say that I’m loving being disconnected. It was really starting to bug me.
I removed myself from Daily Mile and from any site where I “had” to report what I’d done exercise-wise or eating wise each day. I was beginning to feel like a prisoner. I feel so much more at peace knowing that how I’m eating and how I’m moving is my choice and my decision and I CAN be trusted and it’s information only for my eyes.
Mom has a bathroom scale, so of course I weighed myself because I’m only human-or I’m a spongy weak human. I’m just had to know how my little forced experiment was going over the past 2 weeks of not weighing. (Side note: Seriously, isn’t it so weird that I was feeling so pressured by the receiving and giving of information and God made sure that my scale, my computer and my phone was ripped out of my hot little hands? I’m going to stop thinking now. I think it’s becoming dangerous.)
So my big news is that I’m at 189 and since I got to skip that whole angst-filled pattern of struggling with my head to move down into the next level of numbers, it was effortless. So I’m on to something.
189. Breath a sigh of relief with me. It feels so good. It’s hard to believe that I’m going to be at my goal before summer time.
Speaking of maintenance, you have to listen to this podcast by the sweet Shauna and Carla over at “Two Fit Chicks and a Microphone”. It’s all about maintenance in the form of an interview with the queen of maintenance, Lynn Haraldson of Lynn’s Weigh. It opened my eyes big time, in that it made me realize I need to not be a whiny baby about the fact that I’m going to be watching my calories and exercise for the rest of my natural born days. That’s just the way it is. I love that Lynn says that even after 10 YEARS of maintaining, that you can slip up and fall into those old patterns you carried in your head for so many years in the past-and you can gain all of the weight right back. RIGHT. BACK.
Lynn says you need to wake up every single day of your life knowing that you have a plan and that you need to stick to that plan with little variation. It doesn’t help at all to say that it’s “not fair” and it “shouldn’t have to work this way”. It may not be fair but then what is fair?
We’re different in the head if we’ve been seriously overweight. Our natural reaction is often to reach for food when we’re stressed or bored or lonely or sad. An alcoholic also faces the same daily pressure. If millions of alcoholics can stay off the booze then we can stay away from excess eating and from lolling around on the couch all day long. It takes effort and it takes diligence and it doesn’t matter if it “isn’t fair”, it is what it is and I have to do it and I choose not to be ticked off about it. Please listen to the podcast. It helps so much to know a lot about maintaining even if you’re just starting out with the weight loss. With an end goal in mind, it helps you know how to behave during the whole process.
I’ve said it dozens of times and I know it’s a bit annoying, but if you’ve lost weight while trying to hang on to all of those old favorites that get your clock running every time you see them: pizza, cake, Doritos, fast food, ice cream, then it’s going to be 100 times harder for you to maintain. In my opinion, this is why something like 90% of all of the people that re-gain the weight, do so.
It’s hard to divorce yourself from those things that ruin you. It’s scary, I get that. But,like an alcoholic who keeps whiskey and Bailey’s in the cupboard, how can you become a different person if you keep the building blocks of what ruined your life right there in your cabinets?
It simply doesn’t work. I believe you can have all things in moderation, I do. But unless you have cut your most dangerous foods out of your life and distanced yourself from them, I think that your mind just can’t GET that those foods are BAD for you. When your mind truly gets that, it’s not a big deal to have a piece of chocolate cake once every few months. Does that make sense? You must find a way to absolutely love your new healthy foods with all your heart, to the point that THOSE are your go-to foods and that those “other foods” that you used to eat on a daily basis move into the background where they then become your three times a year foods.
It kills me to see so many people lose a few dozen pounds but then get overwhelmed by the very foods that have gotten them into such an overweight state-because they haven’t cut them out of their diet and out of their lives. I hate what those foods did to my life. I hate what my lack of self control did to my life. I hate it so much that I don’t WANT those foods to be my bosom friends anymore. I want them far away from me. I want to have to go out to a restaurant with friends if I want a piece of chocolate cake and then I want to share it with someone, or two someone’s so I can just enjoy a few bites WHILE I’m enjoying friends. I won’t let that demon back on my back and if that’s “not fair” then that’s not fair. I’d rather have health and happiness.