I’m going grocery shopping today. This is my 25 year old son’s way of telling me that he’s out of butter. Yes, this is the way we roll in this odd, odd house.
I was listening to the #2 session of “Two Fit Chicks and a Microphone” last night. , the podcast on “Goals” and as usual, thoughts on goal setting were rolling around in my head. So often the very thing I’m needing, I’m led to and this is no exception.
Diet Girl and Mizfit did a really great job on this podcast, including an interview with Alison of “Now The Plan Is…”. I’ve been thinking about goals and about the misguided idea of gutting it out to get to a goal, which I have so so so often done. I’m probably one of the most persistent people I know so if I want something I’ll move heaven and earth to get there…even if it’s not sensible-but I’m growing in this area at last.
Yesterday, case in point: I had a lot on my mind, it was a lovely day outside and I just wanted to think, ambling along and enjoying a very long almost 6 mile walk WITHOUT running. I felt guilty about it and felt like I should push myself to do it, no matter what, because after all, it was Monday and I HAVE to run Monday through Friday. Yeah. Not so much.
Running was hard last week! Hard I tell’s ya! It was hard to face jumping back in again yesterday. So I took another course and decided to trust myself and the whole process and I walked, and enjoyed every minute of it.
Today, I want to run. But. I don’t want to run a whole mile without stopping. My over 250 pound body says, oy, that’s hard. So, for awhile, I’m going to go back to running 5 minutes, walking a couple and running 5 more, repeat for 4 miles or so. Who really cares? Who’s keeping score? I know I want to run, I WANT to run…but there’s time. And running 5 minutes or one mile is running.
Being reminded that goals are there to gently and persistently guide me, not to control me and force me and manipulate my mind,that was nice to be reminded of. So, I walked just a hair under 6 miles instead of running and walking yesterday; keeping the big picture in mind, I got out into the world and moved and had a wonderful time on my own two feet. I’m happier, I’m stronger and I’m being more compassionate to myself. I KNOW I can do big things, I can remember that about myself. I don’t have to constantly re-prove ME to ME. I think maybe I may finally grow up after all.