You are so weird. Yesterday you’re up 2 1/2 pounds and today you’re down 3 1/2 pounds. Make up your mind already, will you?
Your Biggest Fan
Ooo, I had a wonderful desert last night. I bought a bag of frozen mixed berries and served 1 cup of berries with 2 T. of sugar free whipped cream. It was soooooo good. Where is the picture? Ummmm…I ate it. Sorry. I’m going to buy some more ingredients tomorrow so I’ll try and remember to snap a picture so you can see how great it looks. Seriously, I’m finding that the simplest things are the best.
It’s 9 a.m. and I’m sitting here all dressed up to go out into the chilly sunshine and walk, but I wanted to touch bases here first. I’m working on something that is interesting, to me anyway. I’m studying myself as if I’m an amoeba under a microscope. If I start to feel the slightest bit uncomfortable or unhappy about something in this long journey of mine, I’m taking it apart and dealing with it. I believe that’s the only way I’m going to be able to lose weight and keep it off…to head things off at the pass.
I signed up for a forum over on Runner’s World and was checking in daily with my little minutes of my running each day, melded into my walking program and you know what, I was just starting to DREAD going there and starting to DREAD running. Why? I have no clue. I can’t figure that part out, so much. But I do know that it made it all feel as if I HAD to run so that I could “report” and that I HAD to improve or I’d have nothing to talk about. I do know that all of that is total crap, but I feel oddly pushed against a wall by it and it’s bugging me, a lot. So, I decided not to go back to the forum. Just leave, go away, not to return.
Maybe it’s because in the past several years when I have tried to go back to running (without a healthy diet and weight loss to support it) I pushed myself and shoved myself and tried hard to elbow my way back into the “runners club” and failed miserably because I pushed too hard and shoved too fast. I don’t want to be that person anymore and I think that if FEELS like I’m repeating old patterns. I’ve decided it doesn’t matter why it bothers me, it does. And anything that makes me feel as if I don’t want to work out in a certain way, needs to go.
Oddly, I don’t mind at ALL posting my runs on Nike+ or talking about it anywhere else. So, lesson learned. If something is bugging me or is ruining all the fun of a new type of exercise, it needs to have it’s butt kicked to the curb.
And because I’m missing my guy terribly after being apart for 6 long weeks, here’s a picture. I have taken about 65,000 of these pictures over the years-the old, “squeeze in and take a head shot with my long arm” picture.